When I tried to decide what to write about this blog, I had a different topic planned. But the words just wouldn’t come. Instead I started thinking about how thankful I am for where I am today, how different everything was years ago with my Family, Daddy, Mummy, Sisters, Friends and about everything that happened in between.
Years of terror and sheer joy and incredible happiness and tears and laughter and so much success and so much failure !!
I said horrible things to shame you. I took you for granted and dishonored you. I said you’re not enough. That if you’d only be a better teacher, a better wife, a better friend, a better lover…then I’d love you. If you were more confident, more social, then I’d respect you, if you were a mother, if you achieved your goals, then I’d want you. I’ve said things to you I wouldn’t say to my worst enemy and you’ve taken it, and internalized every calloused word.
I know you are disappointed and sometimes feel like a failure or that it is all your fault. But the truth is: YOU are not a failure nor could you ever be. YOU are strong and brave and honest and YOU will overcome. YOU will persevere and come out on the other side more YOU than you’ve ever been before.
Don’t take everything so personally and try to not let others get you down. Most of the time, things have nothing to do with you, and everything to do with the other person. When people hurt you, try and understand their side of the story. Forgive them. Learn from their wrongdoings, and then let it remain in the past. Not everything is always how it appears.
Remember, Abena, Fear is your biggest enemy. I know you’re thinking, that it’s not that easy. What I’m saying to you is just be free; if you’re not doing anything wrong, be fearless. When fear starts crawling into your heart, tell yourself that no matter what the struggle you will overcome it, the best way you can.
Don’t fear motherhood, when you become a mother, Every minute of every day you will fear for your children’s safety, you will want them to be happy, above all.
People will come and go in your life, and they will make your life beautiful as they pass by in this journey called life. You will learn so much from everyone you meet. You will laugh, you will cry, but you will be surrounded by the most brilliant, supportive people on the earth.
Be who you are. Be proud of the crazy, fun. Love yourself; appreciate who you were made to be. There is no one quite as crazy as you. Enjoy your flaws instead of blaming them, become one with every cell in your body. It is this body that will thank you years from now
Don’t try to be a perfect woman, you were born “superwoman.” You will eventually have “superpowers,” where you can cook while talking on the phone and help your children with homework
Never allow guilt to pull you down. You can only do your own best! As long as you love what you do, you will be fine.
Be proud of who you are today, and you will only get better as the years go by! There are many things I would still like to change about myself, but I’m getting there and so will you.
You are so strong my dear. You have been through a lot and come out on the winning end. The world has tried to break you, but you never let it. Thank your past, for it has made you into a better person today.
I’m so incredibly sorry I failed you. I’m sorry for hurting you, for leaving you, for not reminding you every second of every day how wonderful you are. How worthy you are. How brave and kind and powerful you are. Please forgive me.
In your life, nothing is impossible with God “Job 8:1-10:22 “
Lord, thank you for the example of Job – his faithfulness and trust in you even during the struggles of life. My life is in your hands and at your disposal. Thank you for your amazing love. Thank you that with you nothing is impossible.